savor it all

I have found it quite intriguing lately to observe my daughter's behavior with gummy bears.

Over the past past few months we've given her chewable vitamins, as recommend by her doctor. She is limited to 2 a day; one in the morning, one in the evening. Whenever I give her one she takes it in her little hand and goes to sit down. 5 minutes later she is still holding it, playing quietly with a toy or reading a book. She begins to take tiny bites out of the corner of the bear ...10 minutes go by and she is just finishing it off. My wife responds, "She likes to savor it."


A couple weeks ago we went to a friends birthday party at a park in Culver City. Near the end I had found a bag of gummy bears and gave it to my daughter to enjoy. She happily ate to the bottom of the pouch until she came to the last 2. With one in each fist, she handed me the bag, and ran away to play in the sand. 5 minutes later ... still 2 gummy bears -- playing heartily in the sand. 10 minutes later ... one gummy bear left -- I asked her "What do you have in your hand Selah?" She looked down wistfully at the tiny treat.


I've learned a lot from this simple conduct: not to take things/ situations/ people for granted and to enjoy them as it may be the only, or last you'll ever have. I understand there is a fragile distinction between savoring and hoarding. With this in mind, my wife and I are trying to be attentive to commend appreciation and shun obsession; while working on our own gratefulness for every moment.

the gospel of ignorance

It is hard to internalize the implications of verses like... "the gate is small and the way is narrow that leads to life, and there are few who find it." - Mt 7:14

We would much rather be unaware and blissfully oblivious to things which seem vague or beyond our control.

The phrase "No news is good news" comes from the English King, James I; in 1616 he wrote "No newis is bettir than evill newis." (I know, the english language was still in its awkward phase back then). Now, it is a common adage in the business world, in respect to clients... normally the consumer will only reply (send news) if something needs to change or the product is not all they expected it to be.

In the expression, 'no news' is congruent with ignorance - not knowing or wanting to know any news. This interests me because the word for 'good news' in the Bible is "gospel."

So... ignorance is a gospel

Paul says in Gal 1:8 "But even if we or an angel from heaven should preach a gospel other than the one we preached to you, let him be eternally condemned!"

True good news is knowing release from sin and the promise of life from the death and resurrection of Christ Jesus. "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God." Eph 2:8

out with the old in with the new

This weekend we removed most of the carpet in our house. I wish I had taken some before/after pics, but I'll just have to explain it to you... my wife is 'nesting' right now so naturally we are prepping our home for the new arrival. The dingy dark brown carpet that had been trekked on by thousands of precious feet was ready to meet its resting place at the city dump and the (equally-used/ready-for-refurbishing) hardwood floors beneath were itching to be dawned...

After you remove the carpet which is held down by 'tack strips' you gotta get rid of the insulation below it attached to the floor with staples. Then, of course, you can remove the staples and strips.

so the hardwood floors are new to us... though they are far from new to the house... they'll need a good sanding and refinishing. we'll see how much that run$ us. Besides the proverbial '+/- factors' it's always nice to 'turn-over-a-leaf' and it's refreshing to have another go at decorating..

and this is enough to say "it's worth it."

i assume so

If I am learning anything in life, thus far, it is to assume less. There may be a healthy level of assumption in daily matters, but I have found the threshold of such should be kept desperately low.

'I assume' should not be confused with 'I believe,' 'I trust,' or obviously 'I know.'

Assumption is based on inconclusive, often fabricated, half-truth evidence, whereas belief is ordinarily grounded in belabored perception, trust planted in simple faith, and knowledge rooted in truth.

Standing at a bus stop I can assume that a bus will be coming soon.. based on the fact it's a bus stop. Or, I can believe it's coming because I've read the schedule and seen the signs. I can also trust it's on its way because someone told me it was.

But not until I have seen or experienced it coming can I say, 'I know...'

Even after I know something... I am repeatedly challenged to believe and trust to bolster and increase that wisdom. Assumption, however, does nothing to multiply knowledge, and 'flying by the seat of my pants' (as my father would put it) creates no new rationale (except- details on what not to do) and falls painfully short of true understanding.

my lovely wife

It's my wife's birthday today, so I wanted to take a minute to recount a little of what she means to me.

"Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life...

Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: 'Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.' Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised."

Proverbs 31:11-12,28-30

My wife is truly astounding; She is 7 months pregnant now (as you can tell, this pic was taken a few months ago :) and is handling everything so well!

I have known Jen now for almost 8 years. I still remember the first day I met her. In September, 2001 I walked into a nearly empty classroom at Cal State Fullerton and there she was in the front/center seat with the biggest most beautiful smile I had ever seen... I am not joking or being schmaltzy when i say, it was like a fresh breath of air. It wasn't 'love at first sight, wah wah wah, blah blah blah,' but it was a very real feeling, that I remember to this day.

I fell for her by the end of that school year and knew she was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life when I went to England (for 40 days/nights in the summer of 2002) and found out I couldn't live without her. We were married on June 26, 2004 and this year we celebrated our 'Wooden' anniversary.

She has been a sweet inspiration, a genuine friend, a strong helper, a devoted christian, a loving mother, a tireless worker, a determined realist, and, all the while, a trusting partner; she is my loving wife. Happy Birthday, Jenny.

we did nothing. we did everything.

There are no long sprawling green grass yards, no well-watered hardy gardens, no peaceful paths or silent sidewalks, no majestic oak trees or slender fur saplings, no pretty public parks or safe secluded schools...

every house owns a fence,

all the fences - rusty metal,

each fence blocks a driveway,

all the driveways - quikcrete

every driveway holds a car,

all the cars - dusty brown

and every car fits just barely,

and that leaves us just enough space to eat, sleep and move around.

But none of that matters.

When we walk around this neighborhood, we will find one flower, just one... and that will be enough to make my daughter's face brighten like a light bulb... and that has made this life, all the more, worth living!

be careful little eyes

There is an great amount of verity in the children's lullaby "be careful little eyes what you see." The windows which allow light to shine to the center of the being are in truth very small and the heart of man does well to regard with care where he directs them.

The progression of sight is something like this (I'm far from a scientist, so bear with me): greeted with an array of colors and shapes, the eye sends arrangements of pictures to the mind to be interpreted by the heart. The longer period of time that the eyes remain focussed on a particular scene the more the heart is allowed to meditate on what it has seen. The heart has the ability to sway the whole being of man (his soul). "Guard your heart, for from it comes the rivers of life." (Prov 4:32) Slowly and ever so slightly the soul tilts towards the left or right until a man is overcome by good or evil.

Choose with diligence and belabored care that which your eyes gaze upon.

terrible twos

There is an intriguing modern quip which parents hastily echo to one another to excuse their children's misbehavior between the age of 1.5 to 3.5 years: "He/she is in his/her terrible twos."

This is such an attractive adage because it's ACTUALLY true. The seemingly terrible nature tends to come out when the child is learning to speak/communicate and slowly disperse as they learn to socialize. Here's the problem: it's easier for us (parents) to close our eyes and wait for that year or two to be over, instead of correcting the (t)error.

If I neglect, as a father, to teach my child discipline at this age (though these terrible symptoms may hide themselves hereafter) she will reap the withered fruit of my laziness throughout the rest of her life. Because the terror just becomes dormant to be manifested in the future... it doesn't actually go away.

There is nothing wrong with talking about the terrible twos. They're real. But lets not make that an excuse to be terrible parents. Our conduct during this time is of paramount importance.

vacuuming and matching socks

Not everything, but a lot in life, comes down to vacuuming and matching socks. "That is all there is left to do," my beloved wife commented, as she stepped out of the kitchen turning off the light behind her.

Firstly, there is plenty that still needs to be done around the house, but making a reasonable plan of attack is extremely necessary. I'm glad the Lord doesn't ask us to take care of all our problems at once. We would get extremely worn out, and we wouldn't truly be able to address everything. Instead He says, "Today, work on your temper."

Vacuuming : It's a necessity; especially in our house. We average 35 -50 people through our house a week right now. It's methodical; you can't really mess this up, push the whirring machine in lines, move obstructions out of the path, and make sure not to leave any stragglers. It's loud; everyone in the general vicinity knows you're cleaning, from the slee(awake now)ping child to the vigilant neighbors, but none the less, it must be done and they must know that it is happening.

Matching Socks : It's orderly; like the feeling you get when you clean your room... suddenly your life feels like it's at least a little more organized. It's simple; more so than that matching card game we played when we were kids. Unless your sock collection is ginormous or you have lots of lone soldiers, then there may be more to it. It's quiet; at least it calms me down.

Whether God is working on your outward behavior, or your inward heart, he has enough grace for us, that we, through faith, may be saved.